These things are bittersweet…


Things are moving faster than I ever expected. Who would’ve thought that I would have over 600 hits on my blog?!? I know I’ve been bombarding Facebook with shares and retweeting like crazy on Twitter, but that’s the point of social media…

Anyway, with the way things are moving, I’m really missing my Chance. I mean, really!! I literally feel like half of my heart is missing. Some days are better than others but if you knew who Chance was, you’d know why I miss her so much. She’s the kind of child that you never forget. If you met her once, you’d fall in love with her. Yes, she’s just that special. I can remember this time last year, I would be trying to get her to sleep in her own bed. And trying to get her to stop singing so we could go to sleep. Telling her to stop spilling milk in my bed. I wish I could say those things to her right now. I wish I could hear her singing, “baby, baby, baby, OOOOOOH” or see her dancing to Single Ladies(she would dance her little butt off to that song…Lol). I wish I could feel her feet on me while she’s asleep or a sloppy wet kiss from her in the middle of the night when she felt like kissing me. I wish I could hear her say, “mama…I love you” in a way only she could say it. Or hear her fussing at “Bannon”. Or her wanting to go see her Mommy! Going to Mommy’s house and playing in h makeup. I wish I could see her sitting in her Uncle Memo’s lap and getting absolutely anything she wanted from him. Watching her and her Uncle Shishard(Darrick)arguing and fighting. Her helping her granddaddy wash his truck. Being content looking at her and Brandon while they lay in the floor watching Rio. Her knowing which door Barney would come in. Chance and her cousin Da’sai playing and talking in a language that only they know!! Or her saying “POW” to her TeeTee Erika.LOL!! That was so funny. Her crying when her GodMom Lynn picked her up but her tears instantly dried when they put the car in reverse!! (con artist) See, it’s things like that. Things that people take for granted. Our children aren’t promised to us. They aren’t guaranteed to be here when we wake up in the mornings. Be thankful for the time that you do have with them. Make everyday count. Because you never know when one of you will be gone.

The things that are happening in my life are so bittersweet. I mean, I wish that I could raise awareness with her right beside me. But that’s not the way God planned it. I’m so thankful that I KNOW where she is. Although sometimes I wonder what she’s doing in heaven that’s another post for another day. I was so blessed to have her for the time that I did. Because I promise you, she made my life so much brighter in the 2 1/2 years she was here. And now her legacy will live on for years and years to come. For that I’m thankful.

But I’m still missing my precious, beautiful Sydney Chance…


  1. Or putting her and her bed and she running back into the room laughing her lil butt off. Or her dances wow just amazing. You are and will be an inspiration to soo many people. I know she’s proud of you as we all are.

  2. I knew you would be able to be as strong as I knew your were and will always be. I am so Godly proud of you and what you are doing. I just know you and Chance you will make a world of difference in so many lives. I am prying your strength in the Lord, as well a joy and peace!!!!

  3. I pray that someday you will truly understand why God allows “tragedies” to happen in our lives. It happens to someone like you because you can handle this. Others may would have committed sucide or lost their mind. But Satan can only do to us what God allows him to. Remember our Heavenly Father loves us and He would put no more on us than we are able to bear. I think of the poem footprints in the sand when the person looked back and finally realized that Christ was carrying him throughout whatever the circumstances was that he was facing. Keisha, I asked that you remember this “not only did God carry you thru this ordeal, but He carried Chance too.” (carried her to a better place)

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